Raising children with a co-parent means that you need to be able to communicate with them. While some co-parents are able to do this easily, others have a bit of a struggle. The important thing to remember is that when you communicate with your ex about the children, the needs of the kids should come first.
Effective communication when you’re co-parenting takes work from both sides. Setting the standards early in the relationship is imperative, but you might be able to get this done later if tensions were high at first and have since settled down. Here are three tips that can make the process easier:
1. Learn to take a step back from heated discussions
There’s a chance that some discussions might upset you. Unless the situation is an emergency, you should be able to take a step back to think about the options and how each one will affect your children. Walking away for even a few minutes might also enable you to calm down in a tense situation.
2. Keep the discussions focused on the present
Remember that the children are always the focal point of the co-parenting relationship. At this point, you and your co-parent both need to leave your history in the past and focus on the here-and-now. The concerns of the children in the present are all that matter.
3. Stop making any personal attacks on each other
Maybe you think your co-parent is a slob or they think you spend too much money on needless items. It’s no longer your place to discuss these things unless it involves the children in some way. Avoid personal attacks on each other so you can try to develop a cordial working relationship.
Getting a parenting plan in order should be done as soon as possible after you and your co-parent split. Don’t be afraid to reach out for legal assistance during this process.